First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize