Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
