Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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