I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Randomize
