My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
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