p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Randomize
