nut hugger
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize