i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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