4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Randomize