I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
operation harelip BJ is a go
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
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