He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
