he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize