I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize