What a fucking waste of an outfit
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
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