i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Randomize
