Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
