? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
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