hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
