She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
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