i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize
