The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
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