Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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