i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
