ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
