my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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