Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
