I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
you will always have a special place in my vag
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Randomize
