Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
i was born a porn star she said
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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