i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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