Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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