first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
