No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Randomize
