no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
