i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
