that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Randomize
