did you get engaged???
You're completely useless in the revolution.
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
