i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
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