I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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