I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Randomize