i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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