i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize
