this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
