dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
