everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
