we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize
