Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
