He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
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