We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize