She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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