well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
