I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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